So I’ve been MIA for a while now. A while doesn’t really sum it up, but anyway….
So if you don’t know I’m trying my best to write a book. Well I’ve written it and done a few edits, but I lost my mojo. Not just mojo of writing, but of life.
I have been wondering aimlessly through life with all hope gone. I left my husband for a couple of months. I have lost 41lbs that is the one great thing that has happened. I stopped writing, I stopped reading, I stop mid stride in life. I’m not sure how or why all this happened, but it made me take a good hard look at myself. And guess what I didn’t like the person I had become.
So guess what? The old saying “Only you can change yourself”, well guess what it’s true. So I’m on a mission to find that girl that longs to be let free.
I’m not quite back to writing and editing on my book, but I can feel it’s almost there.
When the poetry starts to spill forth, then I’m almost there and guess what it’s been spilling.
Oh TGIF!!!
Friday, August 20, 2010
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
I’ve lost myself. I’m wondering through drifts of fog, grasping onto anything that feels real and familiar.
Hoping that someone can find me, when I must truly find myself.
I’m suffocating through the emotions that course through my veins, yet my body is unwilling to let them drain forth and explore the world.
I’ve never found the true me, only pieces scattered like leaves after an autumn storm.
Drowning in the darkness from the forest that surrounds me, unwilling to let the sun penetrate through their limbs, as the thorns puncture and tear away my layers of skin, I pray for the rain to wash away the doubt.
The doubt that has crept in like a creature of the night, that tells me I’m not who I think I am.
My true self rages to be let free.
Yet I wonder through the fog hoping for the strength to make it one more day.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Party like a Rock Star!
Party like a Rock Star!
Ok, so I didn’t really party like a Rock Star, but I did have a good time.
This past weekend I went to Nashville to visit one of my closest best friends from high school. I took off Friday and drove all by myself, which is a major accomplishment all on it’s on. I don’t drive, especially by myself and not for a 6 hour trip.
First thing on the agenda was to go to one of the local wineries in a neighboring town. We tasted plenty and bought lots. Before 5 we had downed a bottle. So off we went to get her second tattoo. I was there for moral support. Especially since I just had 5 new ones added about a month ago. This is her new one.
From there we went out to eat. Not much to say about that. From there we went to the liquor store. I think we had way too much fun in there. Here are some pics of my friend. Oh by the way her name is Amy.
Now just to let you know, at this point I have already spent more on alcohol than gas to get there. Glad I have my priorities straight, right? Really I’m not a drunk and I don’t drink often. So two glasses of wine, is more than plenty in one sitting.
Well as if Friday wasn’t jam packed enough we stayed up until 3 in the morning playing guitar hero. Drums, guitar, bass, and singer all included. I was bass and I’m not very good at it. Especially since I had more than two glasses of wine. Soon we crashed, unfortunately my body wanted to get up at 6, but I told it no. I only made it to 9.
Over all it was a great trip. Saturday was very uneventful, due to the weather. Sunday I headed home. A girl needs a little get-away now and then.
Oh and this wanted to sit in my lap the whole weekend.
Not a bad thing, except I’m allergic to cats!
Ok, so I didn’t really party like a Rock Star, but I did have a good time.
This past weekend I went to Nashville to visit one of my closest best friends from high school. I took off Friday and drove all by myself, which is a major accomplishment all on it’s on. I don’t drive, especially by myself and not for a 6 hour trip.
First thing on the agenda was to go to one of the local wineries in a neighboring town. We tasted plenty and bought lots. Before 5 we had downed a bottle. So off we went to get her second tattoo. I was there for moral support. Especially since I just had 5 new ones added about a month ago. This is her new one.
From there we went out to eat. Not much to say about that. From there we went to the liquor store. I think we had way too much fun in there. Here are some pics of my friend. Oh by the way her name is Amy.
Now just to let you know, at this point I have already spent more on alcohol than gas to get there. Glad I have my priorities straight, right? Really I’m not a drunk and I don’t drink often. So two glasses of wine, is more than plenty in one sitting.
Well as if Friday wasn’t jam packed enough we stayed up until 3 in the morning playing guitar hero. Drums, guitar, bass, and singer all included. I was bass and I’m not very good at it. Especially since I had more than two glasses of wine. Soon we crashed, unfortunately my body wanted to get up at 6, but I told it no. I only made it to 9.
Over all it was a great trip. Saturday was very uneventful, due to the weather. Sunday I headed home. A girl needs a little get-away now and then.
Oh and this wanted to sit in my lap the whole weekend.
Not a bad thing, except I’m allergic to cats!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
The Cullen's are near.
So, I’ve explained the fact that my 5 year old son loves Twilight, well listen to this story. (Short but cute)
Saturday afternoon my husband was going to the grocery store and spared me a quiet moment with myself by taking the kids. At one of the red lights my son turns to my husband and has a very serious look in his face and say, “Daddy, the Cullen’s are near.” So my husband says, “Yeah, how do you know?” And my son turns and with a smile on his face says and points out the window at the car beside them and says, “Because that’s their Jeep.”
I so wish I could have been there to hear and see it first hand, but it was great.
Saturday afternoon my husband was going to the grocery store and spared me a quiet moment with myself by taking the kids. At one of the red lights my son turns to my husband and has a very serious look in his face and say, “Daddy, the Cullen’s are near.” So my husband says, “Yeah, how do you know?” And my son turns and with a smile on his face says and points out the window at the car beside them and says, “Because that’s their Jeep.”
I so wish I could have been there to hear and see it first hand, but it was great.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Silence
Sorry for the silence. My grandmother passed away last week and it has been crazy to say the least. I will do my best to get back into routine next week.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Obsession
I told you last week that my 5 year old son has watched Twilight more than I have. Now you might be asking yourself son? Yes son, not my 8 year daughter. He loves it, and when I say love I mean obsessed by it. He has probably watched it a hundred times.
In the very beginning he compared himself to Edward.
‘Mommy does Edward bathe? Because if he doesn’t I don’t need to.’
To this I responded yes he bathes.
‘Mommy does Edward brush his teeth, because if he doesn’t I’m not going to either.’
‘Mommy Edward doesn’t sleep, so I don’t think I need to sleep either.’
So you see my dilemma, but he loves it.
And he can scope out anything Twilight in the stores. I’m not in the door good at Border’s and he has rushed to the table of collectible dolls, jewelry and calendars demanding one of everything.
Now I did go and watch the New Moon movie when it hit the theatre. Of course he wanted to go to, but I talked him into waiting for it to hit the movie stores. And to my disbelief 10 days before its release he started the countdown. He would announce to everyone he came in contact with that ‘The New Twilight was coming out in 10 days.’ Yes that’s what he called it, but now that we ran out and bought it on the 20th, it’s become New Moon. So when we went to Border’s to get the special 2 disc set again, he was more than elated. It was late before we were able to put it in and watch, but that sweet baby stayed up until 11p.m. to watch this movie. I figured he would have conked out at the beginning but he did not. Not once did he talk, move, or blink his eyes. For him that is a miracle on all accounts. Most days getting him to watch cartoons while cook supper is hard enough. He's a busy body and never sits still, but for New Moon, he does.
In the very beginning he compared himself to Edward.
‘Mommy does Edward bathe? Because if he doesn’t I don’t need to.’
To this I responded yes he bathes.
‘Mommy does Edward brush his teeth, because if he doesn’t I’m not going to either.’
‘Mommy Edward doesn’t sleep, so I don’t think I need to sleep either.’
So you see my dilemma, but he loves it.
And he can scope out anything Twilight in the stores. I’m not in the door good at Border’s and he has rushed to the table of collectible dolls, jewelry and calendars demanding one of everything.
Now I did go and watch the New Moon movie when it hit the theatre. Of course he wanted to go to, but I talked him into waiting for it to hit the movie stores. And to my disbelief 10 days before its release he started the countdown. He would announce to everyone he came in contact with that ‘The New Twilight was coming out in 10 days.’ Yes that’s what he called it, but now that we ran out and bought it on the 20th, it’s become New Moon. So when we went to Border’s to get the special 2 disc set again, he was more than elated. It was late before we were able to put it in and watch, but that sweet baby stayed up until 11p.m. to watch this movie. I figured he would have conked out at the beginning but he did not. Not once did he talk, move, or blink his eyes. For him that is a miracle on all accounts. Most days getting him to watch cartoons while cook supper is hard enough. He's a busy body and never sits still, but for New Moon, he does.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
